When Shakira Made Me Cry

I had my final swan song, and it included a life size cardboard bus, mini Michael Jackson wannabes, and Chinese fans. Confusing I know, but stay with me. I am talking about the Africa Umoja Concert at the school where I teach dance. "Umoja" means spirit of togetherness, and that's exactly what the concert was about! Over a period of 4 months, I taught the kids how to do zumba, jazz, lyrical, hip-hop, how to dance with props and acting. All of this was within the influence of dance throughout African history. The director of the show, and also my favorite counterpart because she gets me, based the concert of the popular African show titled by the same name as ours, Africa Umoja. The show takes you through African culture over the years by song and dance. Starting with the traditional dances, gospel songs, gumboot dancing, jive dancing that was found in the clubs in Metropolitan areas, and so on.

Our concert consisted of over 13 songs, combined with the senior school. I was in charge of choreographing the junior school. Since I don't have the capability to post a video of the hour long concert, I'll have to just tell you the play list. 

           1. Waka Waka- the dance group of the school, did a routine to the popular song by Shakira that was the theme song of the World Cup in 2010. FIFA World Cup South Africa may have been over four years ago, but the pride the continent felt for hosting such a big events is still as big as ever. This song, Waka Waka was the opening song of the concert. The girls were dressed in bright neon colors with sequins belt and wrist bands that moved when they shook their bodies. This song now has a special meaning to me, as I cried in the middle of the airport when I heard it weeks after the show.

          2. Flag Parade- I'm not sure who the composer of this instrumental song was, but it was such a cool jazzy number where we did a lot of things. In this song, we had 19 flags of Africa represented on big glittery cardboard, we had 7 drummers, 8 ribbon girls, and 5 dancers. We filled the auditorium with this dance, coming in from all 4 wings, the 3 aisles in the back, and movement throughout the stage. The highlight was when the Swazi flag came down the center of the aisle and everyone cheered!

          3. Africa Sunrise- This was such a powerful song by Helmut Lotti. It talks about the beauty of Africa. I had 20 grade 2 girls come on in a weaving pattern on stage, carrying giant 1 meter fans. At certain cues in the song, the girls opened the fans. Because the fans were so big and the musical cues where drastic, the movement, while not difficult, was very dramatic. In the midst of the moving fans, was "mother Africa", she came on the stage and danced here lyrical dance with ribbons across the stage. Such a beautiful piece

           4. Jika- This is a very popular song by South African group Mi Casa. I would consider this song the crowd favorite of the concert. Not because the song, ok well maybe because of the song, but mostly because of the grade two boys who came on stage in a suit and tie with gold hats in tow. These little boys can move! I'm talking like "make you blush" kind of moves! 

            5. In the Jungle- this of course is the classic expected that song we wish to see performed by any little tyke. For the grade 1 girls, we had them dressed up a birds who were the main dancers. The cheeky little boys were the lions, and the rest were village people who walked on stage and conveniently got scared by a lion. Yes it was cliche, but its so cute when you see a six year old dressing in a big lion mane, carrying a stuffed animal lion on stage.

            6. Penny whistle-  this song by Mango Groove was the back drop to our "taxi scene". Our set director constructed a life size bus that the kids pushed on stage. We were acting out the comical and chaotic scene that is of the infamous  bus ranks of Africa. We had bus conductors shouting, people dancing through the rank, girls on their cellphone, businessmen, mothers with babies on their backs, someone selling fruit, boys playing with toys, and of course one little white girl with a backpack on walking through confused with a map. There was a lot of activity going on, but it pulled off well!

            

Those were the big numbers that I choreographed, there rest were all choir songs, or just ones were the kids walked on and off stage. Overall though I am so happy with how the concert went. It truly was the highlight of my service. 

Have a Mandela Kind of Mindset

My final month of work couldn't have been more stressful, yet more rewarding if I had wanted it to be. I saw a lot of things come into fruition, and I also saw a lot of things come to pass. Some relationships ended on a bad note, others were mended, and most were strengthened. Expectations where met, and disappointments were minimal. Overall I am 100% satisfied how things ended and if given another chance, I would do the whole thing over in a heartbeat. The PC saying is true, it is " the toughest job you'll ever love". 

 The weeks counting up to my departure, I was pressed with making sure I got all my life skill lessons taught. My class had to work at a fast pace which was the opposite of what they were doing with all their other classes. Instead of taking a break during their exam weeks, we kept working and made up classes throughout the term. I wanted to do more activities with them, but realized that it would just be too much. Thankfully, the English teacher saw that we were working on job skills and writing resumes. I wanted to take the classes into the computer lab to type them out, but time did not permit us with that luxury. So instead of using the limited amount of classes I had left, the English teacher is going to continue with the writing if the resumes in her class.... At least that is the plan. I am proud of my Grade 11 class through. Sure there could have been a lot of improvements with that class, but they have been dealt a bad hand; however they are handling it as best they can without much help. For example, my class didn't receive books, so everyday I had to print out pages of their book from my one copy (which yes I know is also a privilege that my school even has a copier). The students weren't given folders or anything else to secure their papers. Knowing that these students are still young, I didn't expect them to keep perfectly a years worth of information in their bags, but to my delight maybe only one or two ever lost their stuff. We also crammed  three terms of curriculum in two. Now typically I normally bash teachers who just rush through the syllabus to get it done, because I feel the students don't really learn the information. This was not the case for my kids. The national standards say that students only need a 60 to pass and be on track, well my students had a class average of 89% with no one below a 60! There were only two lessons that I did not get to with the students, but once I met the new PCV replacing me I knew that she would be a perfect fit to teach those last sessions and it would be a good way for her to warm up with the students. Wishing the best for her! 

I was a little bit nervous about leaving because I thought everything I did might just fall (and it still might, only time will tell), but again I am so thankful that my site was replaced by a new PCV. The library I started at the primary school was still far from being finished and the new PCV was willing to continue it when I left. In the beginning of this blog I said I had some stressful and disappointing times, well this was one if them. If there was one thing I could change about my service, it would have been to have spent more time at the primary school. The library project was probably the biggest thing that needed to be done, but for many reasons it was a hassle to get started. My final months, literally down to my final days, I was held up in the library for hours a day trying to get it done. Personal feelings aside, I didn't want to complete it for my own glory; never once was this one of those " look what I did" situations. My sole purpose for being so stubborn and wanting to get this library done was because this is the one thing that the kids wanted. Everyday the kids would come up to me and ask me if they can have library class, or if they could check out a book. I so much wanted them to tell them yes! If anything, the biggest lesson I've learned here, development wise, is how important literacy is. The kids at the primary school, eventually will be kids at my high school. If we could improve their literacy when they are in grades 3, imagine how well they will test in Form 3!  Nelson Mandela said that "education is the most important factor of sustainable development",oh how I wish this concept would resonate! My mind will always be on those kids and that library; I pray for the new PCV as she is walking into this big challenge. I also pray for the teachers  that they catch on, and for the students that they hang on.

So Much to Do, Not Enough Time

I am left with 5 days in Swaziland, somebody pinch me! I can't believe it is time to go. There is still so much I have to do. My biggest obstacle I am left with is writing my Description of Service (DOS). This is hard, because I haven't even had time to think! There has also been so much that has happened in the past month that I haven't had time to blog about.

So I just wanted to send out a hey there to all my readers. I will be absent the next couple weeks, but I promise to fill you all in on what's been happening. I'll be blogging about my last days in SD probably when I am sitting in the comfort of my own bed or a Starbucks. But before I get there, I am going to spend 2.5 weeks traveling through Namibia, Botswana, Zambia, and Zimbabwe. Until then...

...Sala Kahle.

Feelings

Today as Term 2 closed, I bid farewell to the kids at my three schools. I really can't believe that this is it, my job as a life skills/ dance teacher are over in Africa. It only feels like just yesterday that I was standing before a sea of unfamiliar faces. Has it really been two years? It's hard to imagine that so much has happened between then and now. I've learned so much about myself and what I am capable of; however, it's my emotional strength that has been tested the most. Being here, I have had my highest highs and my lowest lows. There were days when I honestly questioned why I was here.Other days I thought, "Man, I can't leave. There is so much to do!" Sometimes I was surround by so much love and support, other times I literally felt like everyone was out to get me. There were those moments where things just clicked and projects succeeded, on the other hand I had those moments where I just wanted to bang my head against the wall. As much as I wanted to give, give, give, I equally wanted to be selfish. I feel sorry for my mom, as she is probably confused of what to tell people when they ask her how I am doing. Should she say that I love it here, or that I
am miserable? Both would be an accurate answer. As I am saying my goodbyes, I am overwhelmed with emotions. I am heartbroken to say goodbye to some wonderful people. But I am also heartbroken, because I still feel alone. People ask if I am ready to come home, and
without hesitation, I say "Heck yea!", yet I am just as sad to be parting ways. I don't know if I'll ever come back here, and that hurts me to pieces, knowing I may never see people who I consider family ever again.So how do I do I deal with all of these feelings? First I cry.... then I blog.

Expert in Love

Have you ever heard a song, listened to a lecture, or sat through a sermon and thought ‘Wow! This is for me.’? Well that’s what happened to me today at church. God gave the right words to my pastor today that just spoke to me.

Over the past month, I have been really trying to hold my tongue. I thought that when people found out I was leaving, that they would be sympathetic and sad to see me go. Guess what! I’m not as hot as I thought I was. The same people, who rejected me, still continue to do so, and will be doing it as I taxi out of Swaziland. I guess I shouldn’t have expected them to actually be sad, but a simple “thank you for all you’re hard work” would certainly have alleviated my anguished feelings I associate with them. Instead I am left with the impression that they never liked me, and when they weren’t talking about me behind my back (or in front of me in Siswati), they only acknowledged me when they wanted something.  To be perfectly honest, I HATE that. I sincerely HATE that I am left with that impression. My whole two years here, I tried to get this certain group of people to warm up to me, I wanted to work with them and not against them. And I am still for the life of me trying to figure out why they despise me, though I have an idea which I believe is really too petty for me to even type. The stress that I had while being here wasn’t caused by the lack of amenities I had been accustomed to in the states, it was from the group of people who on a daily basis stole my joy.

I admit, while they may have been the cause, I have only myself to blame for becoming distressed. I was letting the enemy claim defeat. I was ready to walk into my Head Teacher’s office on Wednesday and tell him that I quit and will finish my last month of service at my other school. But then, today I was encouraged by Paul. Paul of Tarsus, you know that guy who wrote half of the New Testament 2000 years ago. In church, we read Philippians 1, and I swear to you— my ears were burning!

In Philippians 1, Paul is chained up and under house arrest. He couldn’t even lie down without hearing the shackles move, but he still prayed with joy (v.4)! Then he goes on to say in v.6 that God is STILL doing a great work in us. Paul viewed his adversity with joy, and saw it as a way to promote the gospel. Me, I see it as stopping point and a time to be bitter and complain. If I truly am a Christian like I claim to be, I need to be thankful for what God has accomplished and be confident in God’s ability to bring His work to completion. I need to look at my adversity and rejoice that God has brought me to that circumstance, and rejoice that He will bring me through it! And when I think about v.6 and how it says He will continue a good work in us until the day of completion on the day of our Lord; I also let that resonate, that He will continue to help me do good work until my PC service is complete in 4 weeks.  God has given me the strength to do this for 2 years… and He is going to remain doing it all the way up to the last minute. So if God clearly says He is not giving up on us, than I shouldn’t give up on myself.

I thought that message right there was enough to sustain me for the rest of my time here, but then our pastor went on to read verses 9-11. The bullet point she used, was we need to “cultivate agape love towards one another”. In order to experience all that God has for us, we have to grow in our love for each other. We need to be experts in love! Confession time: I definitely wasn’t feeling the love for that group of people in my community who slandered my name. Who am I to complain?  Paul was in chains when he wrote in Philippians 4:4 “Rejoice in the Lord always!” If I am to be pure and blameless, I need to grow in love. 

Speaking of being pure and blameless (v.10-11), the literal translation means “not to stumble against”. *Again, at this point, my ears where burning. On Wednesday, when I had planned to tell my Head Teacher I quit, I also planned on giving those teachers a piece of my mind once and for all. Thank God the Lord stopped me with these words today, cause I was surely about to make a fool of myself. I genuinely want others to see Christ when they look at me. How would those teachers ever had known that, if my head is about to pop off? What I learned today is that our lives are either a smooth path that others will see God, or they are rough and distracting so that others will stumble to see the truth.  Looks like I have my work cut out for me this week.

Hebrews 12:14 “Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.”

Month of Retreats

The month of June, I spent nearly every weekend on a retreat/workshop. The first workshop was with PC for our COS (Close of Service), the second was a spiritual retreat by an organization in America called the Family Foundation, and the third was a ladies retreat with the women of my church. I had a lot of fun bonding with the people on the trip and seeing some amazing sites of Swaziland and South Africa.

COS Conference at Maguga Dam. Situated in the North Western corner of Swaziland, the Maguga Dam is one of the most beautiful sites in the country, if not the best. It is covered with the highest mountains and lowest valleys. The dam is just below the town of Piggs Peak, which is the area known for their forest. I went there with all the PCVs who I came with in 2012. It was our final workshop where we learned about our next steps as we go back into the real world. We learned about the opportunities we have as a RPCV, the resources, and the community. We also learned about all the stuff that still needs to be done. I still need to do two more reports at least, have a couple exit interviews, poop in a cup, get tested for HIV, return my fake penis model, and get rid of my cats. Thankfully I have 2 more months to figure that all out.

This was by far the nicest facility where PC has ever held a workshop for us. It was our reward for finishing up our service. We ate a lot, and played a lot, and took more than our fare share of pictures. The last day we all sat in a circle and wrapped string around our wrist, where we were all attached. As we sat in silence, we realized that this was the last time we will all be Group 10 together. After our moment of solace, we cut the string and tied it on our wrist. Eventually the string will fall off, and when it does, we will have moved on.

 

Ancient Paths Weekend at Mabuda Farms. I spent the weekend at Mabuda Farms, which is a beautiful Bed and Breakfast owned by a wonderful couple that goes to my church. They hosted this workshop that is initially from the states. I had never heard of it before, but apparently they have a huge overseas base. The workshop was about the power of blessings within your family. I was the only single young adult there, and I also had no children, so for me the weekend was more about learning and soaking in the information, rather than a “breakthrough”. I really did enjoy it and plan on utilizing the information when I do decided to have a family. They also did a session where we learned about our names. In Hebrew tradition, there was a name ceremony. They applied that same concept and told us how special our names our and how they reflect us. My name was spot on. Taylor, which I always knew was “a tailor, or someone to mend clothes”. It also means, “to cut, or covenant”. I applied that to God having his covenant with me. The attributes are also that I am a creative person. I wish I could write more about it, but I don't have the exact information on me as a write this. Then my middle name, Noelle means “Christmas” which I already knew. It also means “bringer of good news”. I look at were I am and what I want to do with my life and it totally applies. The attributes associated with that name are cheerful and adventurous. Kudos mom for naming me!

Women of Strength Conference in Mdloti, South Africa. This was by far my favorite place, mainly because I was right on the beach! I spent the weekend with 24 wonderful women from my church. The theme of the weekend was Women of Strength. The biblical example used were, Deborah, Ruth, and Abigail. I loved this retreat, because it was based on everything I've been doing here- empowering women. Our pastor encouraged the women to be bold and strong, to have a can-do attitude, to be humble, and patient, to be inspired, and to always let God lead you. We spent time going to Durban, and there we went to Ushaka Sea World as well as the harbor. The weather didn't cooperate with us until the last day, but that was perfect. Our final day we had a church service and communion on the beach. Looks like I can cross that one off my bucket list!

Challenge for Africa

Not to long ago, I read a book called “Challenge for Africa”, you can read the review here. The book has been in my mind ever since, especially with all the news hitting Swaziland right now. With my time coming to a close (68 days left), I have to wonder, is Swaziland really better than it was when I first came 2 years ago? Sure, there has been a new airport built, unnecessary but nice. There has also been a lot of development in Ezulweni with the expansion of their new mall. Even Mbabane, the country's capital got a face lift. Does all that equate to progress?

In the eyes of the privileged, I am sure they think so. However, if the game changers of the country actually took a moment to drive their new S- class Mercedes out of the city and into the rural areas, they would see that the country they live in is far away from progress. Right now I am speaking of infrastructure, even though we all know advancement is more than a few buildings. If one was to go off the beaten path, away from Manzini, Ezulweni, and Mbabane, they would notice the horrible road conditions that connect the country together. If you go to the bottom region of the country, the majority is made up of gravel roads. If you go to the Lubombo region where I live, you'll be hard-pressed to find a patch in the road that isn't shamed with potholes. These conditions are embarrassing to the nation, considering that major business happens along these “highways”. In my neighborhood alone, we have the factory for Swaziland's most profitable export, sugar. We also are host to many tourist attractions, with several game reserves that are home to the Big 5. Speaking of tourists, if you want to get to Mozambique, you have to drive on these roads. That new airport I mentioned earlier that was just built, it's also here in Lubombo. It was built with the idea of bringing more business into the country. In fact we even had the Namibian president come to my village last month. With all of this traffic in my region, it's a pity that the major roads which carry people are distressing. This rant isn't about me being picky or bitter, it is based on facts and public opinion. This year alone, we have had over 30 people die in major traffic accidents. For a country this size, it's simply inexcusable.

Cars swerving to dodge potholes.

According to the Swaziland government website, they define a first world country is when “all citizens are able to pursue their life goals and live lives of value and dignity. This implies that all citizens have access to sufficient economic resources, education, health, quality infrastructure, and government services.” Swaziland is in the spotlight, for making the bold statement that they will become first world with in the next decade. The king has a vision to take Swaziland to first world status by 2022. *sigh* Where do I even begin with this? Seriously. Sometimes I just shake my head with the overwhelming tasks ahead. As we speak, my high school debate team is preparing for a symposium with the Swaziland Standard Association (SWASA). They have to answer the question, “how will standards assist Swaziland in reaching first world status?” It's been two months, and my students still haven't come up with the answer. Maybe they know deep down inside, but that thought process hasn't been taught to them- to be critical thinkers. They try to use the internet, but the answer to that question isn't there. Even if it was, searching through Google has proven to be a tedious task. Fact is, 99% of my students (and maybe this statistic relates to the other schools too), are computer illiterate by time they graduate. I could blame myself if I wanted to; it is after all one of the projects PC does in teaching life skills. However, if I were to carry that burden, then my work here would not be limited to two years- it's a lifetime of work. I can only hope the next PCV can help improve that statistic. Back to what I was saying about this symposium coming up. This whole discussion of improving SD to be first world, has been nothing but a discussion. A few weeks ago, business and lawmakers met with SWASA to have a forum on what the country can do. One of the ministers even stated that all businesses should work with SWASA. How can businesses work with SWASA when the country isn't even that concerned with the standards anyways. And if businesses registered with the standards, who would be the one to make sure that there is accountability? In my life skills class I teach, using South African text books, they even mention that a good government has accountability. The whole point of this post is to create a discussion. Talk about the repercussions, talk about the benefits, talk about the challenges and the changes that need to happen for this country to be first world. It won't happen unless the people do it. The whole point is to be less dependent on foreign aid and counsel. Let the country be responsible for itself. The only ones who can save Africa, is Africa. One of my favorite heroines, Kenyan born Wangari Maathai talks a lot on this.

This brings me to my last and final concern. A country with real motivation to be change will change. Cut the facade and be a country of action. Last week, Swaziland was revoked it's privileges to be apart of the African Growth OpportunityAct (AGOA) by the US. AGOA helps over 40 Sub-Saharan countries gain duty free access to the American market. In Swaziland, this affected the textile and agriculture industries that employed over 20,000 people. Now, thousands of employees have lost their jobs. Swaziland failed to meet the 5 AGOA benchmarks which included; registration and recognition of trade unions and employee federations, full passage of the amendment to the Suppression of Terrorism Act, freedom of assembly, speech, and organization, dissemination of implementation of the code of good practice on protest and industrial actions. Coming into the AGOA isn't mandatory, and America isn't bullying Swaziland to abide by its rules. AGOA is another means for which countries can take accountability into the advancement of their society. America's mission is to promote democracy. Underlining the three goals of PC, it still reeks with American democracy propaganda, but is that really a bad thing. We are not trying to change the government structure, in fact, I think a monarchy is just fine here. It is the idea of democracy and the idea of letting citizens voices being heard, and the protection of human rights, that we're all after. As I type this, two Swazi's are still sitting behind bars for exorcising their right to freedom of speech. Protesters and shut down and workers rights are being ignored. How is that a good thing? Taking a quote from Wangari, she says “ Democracy doesn't solely mean one person one vote. It also means, among other things, the protection of minority rights; an effective and truly representative parliament ; an independent judiciary; an informed and engaged citizenry; and independent fourth estate; the rights to assemble, practice one's religion freely, and advocate for one's own view peacefully without fear of reprisal or arbitrary arrest; and an empowered an active civil society that can operate without intimidation.”

As Swazi's sit on edge of this pivotal moment, one can only hope that this be a wake of call. There is no room for “Swazi-time”. If change is to happen, it has to happen'now now'.